First off, Gustav the Impotent Ostrich
According to Yahoo News, some teens in Germany set off firecrackers, rendering a local's ostrich Gustav impotent. "[The] farmer claims that fireworks set off by the boys made the previously lustful Gustav both apathetic and depressed, and thus unable to perform for a half-a-year with his two female breeding partners." (I'm of course curious as to how something without a penis can be impotent.)
In the Netherlands, "It's always the same — the first ones to shy away are the women. You see that at nudist camps too," said Henk (no last name given.) Shy away from what? Working out nude with "[a ] dozen middle-age and elderly men [who] were game enough for a Dutch gym's invitation to work out nude." Dear, dear Henk....you must be mistaken. Why would any woman in her right mind shy away from this?
I pity the AP photographer trying to find tasteful ways to shoot this.
From the News of the Weird Blog: "Army drill sergeant Edmundo Estrada, 35, has been accused of unorthodox therapy on a depressed trainee, having him dress up as Superman and moan as Estrada did some sexual things to him which Estrada apparently had seen on a porno movie involving a Superman character weakened by kryptonite and moaning as he is sexually tortured."