Horrorscopes

Two horoscopes that seem to have my number...

Your dramatic lion-like traits, which you've always assumed made you a charismatic, appealing person, have actually made most people despise you, and today is no exception.

You know that your opinion is the one that counts. But just as a courtesy, could you ask your partner for his or her thoughts before you get started? Otherwise, you could start to seem a little dictatorial.

I always imagined when I had my head bicced that if you put the right hat on me I could vaguely resemble Mussolini...or Donald Pleasance in a tea cozy.