the Sublime

Sometimes I think people are appalled when they realize just how much television I watch. I know I'm supposed to be a poet: well-read, live in my own head, in-touch with my own emotional life. But really, a boy needs to charge up his batteries sometimes. And what charges my batteries? Trash.

Last week, I was supposed to be working diligently on pieces for an anthology, a chapbook, and maaaaybe (if I was lucky) some new poems. Work got done...but not as much as I'd hoped. How could I be productive when VH-1 was doing the America's Next Top Model marathon (and I got to see Tyra's shrieking meltdown for the very first time.) I was also reading poetry and letters and things like that while I was watching. Nothing makes me appreciate Linda Gregg and Jack Gilbert like hearing Ms. Jay Alexander and Twiggy nattering away in the background.

As much as I'm looking forward to the cringe-inducing possibilities for VH-1's newest crop of celeb-tv (I Love New York looks massively embarrassing), what really has me slathering is Court TV's newest offering, 'Til Death Do Us Part. It stars John Waters as "The Groom Reaper." According to the Court TV press release Waters will be "guiding viewers through the true stories of doomed marriages that end with one spouse murdering the other. Each episode dramatizes the events of a true crime, opening at the couple’s wedding, with the time-traveling Groom Reaper as an unexpected guest, foretelling the worst. Through tantalizing and dramatic scenes from the marriage, the Groom Reaper reveals the story of the ill-fated relationship, leaving viewers guessing as to who will be the victim and who will be the culprit." It premieres January 22. I. Can't. Wait. I hope that there's an Unsolved Mysteries quality to the re-enactments.

I hope this leads to shared air time with Nancy Grace. God that thought makes me quiver. Frankly I can't think of anyone more suited for something like this than Waters. His obsession with American crime goes back decades and if the writing and production values are good this could be a nice little piece of cult television. I think I need to go watch Female Trouble.