Webjunk

Last week's Democratic debate failed to bring the crazy...most likely due to the fact that they only had 90 seconds (at most) to answer questions. Tonight it's the GOP's turn. Surely, in their zeal to prove that they love Amurka and hate the fags the most they'll come up with some winners. Go here to to get your virtual paper doll of Rudy in Drag (you can also dress up Obama, W and Hillary if you desire.) If you're going to be watching the debates tonight on MSNBC you can print out your own Conservative Failure Buzzword Bingo card and play as these 10 guys spout off. I'll bet you'll hit bingo before all 10 have even answered one question.

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In an attempt to be hip, edgy and oh-so-Web 2.0, Hillshire Farms have launched an online campaign called Go Meat. This somehow manages to kill my love of sausage.

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I'm sure these'll be big with the purity pledgin', daddy prom goin', abstinence girls in the South: Tampon Tasers.

Ladies can replace that monthly period with an exclamation mark as feminine hygiene goes lethal with The Pink Stinger, a taser/stun gun creatively disguised as a tampon...except for the buttons, prods and high voltage. This weapon of mass absorption aims to target a niche market consumer, that being the tampon wielding women who desire private and discreet security in a friendly familiar package.
The tampon taser/stun gun is the latest in portable and personal security systems. The beauty of this taser/stun gun, aptly named The Pink Stinger, is its ingenious design and ability to be concealed nicely and unassumingly into any purse for ultimate stealth. The taser's gentle glide zapplicator easily fits in the palm of your hand for incredible comfort and protection and ready for honorable discharge at a moments notice. In addition, its fresh floral scent helps eliminate the smell of fear, not just cover it up.

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Andrew Sullivan is absolutely obsessed with "fat lesbians" this week. Methinks someone's CPAP is malfunctioning.

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Christ, I need a drink